People used to said this word " Life is hard to predict ".. Now i finally know hows this word works in my life..
I do admit last time i was an emotion, lack of self-confident girl and perhaps feel pessimism for certain matters. I used to think scare to said "no" to people, scare people will easily forget at me, scare people not trusting at me, scare the feeling that losing things that important and mean to me and many more. This is who i am for last time..But i thought it was gone away from me long time ago.. I thought i had successfully change to a girl that full with confident and became optimism than last time...Feel more braver to face any problems that come to me..
But unfortunately the truth always make people feel heart-breaking..
Recently there's alot things happen in my life.. until I almost can't take it.. The more i protect the more i strive for but end up things never happen like what i expect.
What i get just a shattered dreams and hope only..
I really have a feeling that just want to put down everything and run away from all these annoying matters.. make my life more easier..
Guest what... All my "best friend" come back to me once again.. haha.. God really fooling me around... Again now all this feelings "living and stay" with me..
Now my brother staying so far away from home and family.. staying at a place far from city and full of criminal cases city .. like what he said "jungle life"..Studying suppose a fun things but he seems like suffering..i wish i have money to let him study in a better environment but too bad i cant help and protect him for that.. what a bad sis i am...:(
At yet my best friend just admitted to hospital because she found that she have a dermoid cyst on her uterus.. the worst part was i just got to know her recently life was full of difficulty because she had experienced all the bad incidents all together in her life..
I feel so shame and so sad because as a best friend of her, when ever i need her, she will always be with me no matter what happen but i can't even accompany with her to go through this sucks things and let her alone with all these..
I really really feel so sorry and angry at myself.. :(
WHY all this will happen in my life???? Can somebody tell me why??
Now what i can do is blessing for them.. I really hope everything will be fine..
